Gas station bathroom poop

[ManBungalow]

Did you use a random noun generator to come up with this thread title?

[Lootifer]

Urinating on your significant other in the shower when their back is turned is funny since they don't know it happened.

If you don't have a significant other, you can do the same thing in the showers in a locker room, however, the potential consequences are much steeper in the unlikely event the other person happens to notice. This could include physical assault, jail time or even a 10-day ban from use of the elliptical machine. As a consequence, I generally recommend people do not do this. (Unless you're Lootifer and have such fantastic calves you don't need the elliptical machine. Then piss wherever, and on whomever, you want. You earned it!)

[patrickaa317]

How did that person get out of the bathroom without smearing the shit when they opened the door??

They never went in.

How did they get out after pooping?

Maybe they used a window.

I would guess that they merely cracked the door wide enough to just squeeze out. Whoever came into the room next would likely not do the same. Bam, full squish!

That's how I'd do it. Frankly I'm surprised that no one else came up with this as the solution. Maybe that says something about the intelligence of those who didn't think of it... or maybe it says something about Tim and myself that we did think of it.

Bollocks.

I personally wanted to go for maximum smear where there isn't even enough room to squeeze through the door after dropping it. That was my thought process.

[betiko]

Public bathrooms are some of the most clear cut evidence of the rareness of basic human decency. For anyone that cares: if you can't avoid pissing all over the toilet seat then for the greater good you have to sit down while you pee.

You have to sit on the piss-covered seat?

In a Pizza Pizza in Toronto someone took a shit right where the door opened into the bathroom. Opening the door smeared the shit all over the floor.

That was betiko.

Hey in the ponderings thread i gave my top 2 worse public toilet stories, i was a victim not an offender!

[betiko]

How did that person get out of the bathroom without smearing the shit when they opened the door??

They never went in.

How did they get out after pooping?

I would guess that they merely cracked the door wide enough to just squeeze out. Whoever came into the room next would likely not do the same. Bam, full squish!

That's how I'd do it. Frankly I'm surprised that no one else came up with this as the solution. Maybe that says something about the intelligence of those who didn't think of it... or maybe it says something about Tim and myself that we did think of it.

Bollocks.

I personally wanted to go for maximum smear where there isn't even enough room to squeeze through the door after dropping it. That was my thought process.

escalade the door, put your ass on the toilet side, do the thing and get out. Technically just your ass would get in and the door would never be opened.