Conquer Club

nietzsche wrote:

When is an apple not an apple?
When it is a Grapple
(pronounced "grape - L").



This is a real t-shirt you can buy for $17
A Grapple is a plastic-encased apple that has been drenched in artificial chemicals that taste like grape Kool-Aid.
This is why I'm not in marketing,
I don't spin it to make you want to spend $1 per apple.
I should learn from the team at Grapple:
"The ingredient mix primarily includes concentrated grape flavor and pure water.
A relaxing bathing process prepares our apples for you or your kids."
(A relaxing bathing process?)
Ingredients: apples, natural and artificial flavor
Q) Why does it say ‘Natural and Artificial Flavor’?
A) Our main flavor ingredient is the same synthesized grape flavoring agent used in 100’s of other retail food items. (I'm not comforted)
Because it is not feasible for us to ‘crush all of the flavor’ we would need from grapes themselves, we are forced to say ‘Natural and Artificial Flavor’." - Marketing Genius
(They mean it is not financially beneficial to use real grapes.)
Who said there was something wrong with the Creator's apple in the first place?

Funkyterrance wrote:I was in a thrift store today and I saw a "vintage" political button thing for sale in there that said "Don't but non(some acronym) grapes!". I'm guessing it was some kind of hippie movement/protest as the lettering looked 60s-70's but does anyone know what the hell it was referring to? I should just buy the stupid thing and wear it everyday until some old hippie sees it and has a flashback or something. When he/she comes out of it I can ask him/her what the f*** it's referring to.

And I don't wanna talk about it
Gangsta shit right in front you nigga walk around it
Nigga let me do me
They know I kick it like Jet Li Bruce Lee
And I've done what they can't do me
I'll put my gun up to your Aunt Suzie
And blow out a dubie paint her ruby I am a looney you niggas puny
I puke on the beat I juke and never fumble
Man I spit that dope like I swallowed a bundle
Gotta spit that dope up cause the old heads said if you don't it'll bust
I heard if I sell it hard it'll rush but if them people come if its soft it'll flush
Certainly don't get in the caught in the blind and keep yo curtain straight
No I don't drink wine but I smoke purple grapes sometimes see purple stars
I ain't talking about purple bapes
I gets paid early cause I be workin' late
Too many painful memories shit hurt to say
Crack flow no bake just stir and shake
Shootin' when we pull up like Urkel waste
Sip syrup got me movin' at a turtle pace
But quick draw pop out like a turtle face
Paid in full you can't murk the ace
I kill your beat and beat the murder case
That's right I'mma kill this shit and
If the glove don't fit I'mma need a catcher's mitt
Cause I'm high like a pitch yeah I'm high
Like a pitch like Mariah and shit
I guess I'm higher than a bitch
Keep it dirty like I'm lyin' in a ditch
Like Eli I'm from New Orleans I'm a Giant in this bitch
Move the G and add an S and put the I before the N and put
The A in front of that and that's what I am to the end
That's a Saint mothafucka simplify it for them
Where your funeral comes with a second line at the end yeah
But you won't be second linin' with them cause
You be in the hearse that's behind all of them yeah
I see your homies dressed in black like they finna
Ride but that fashion statement is tellin' a lie
I'm pelican fly Mac 11 inside my bullets come with
Wings and your cerebellum can fly yeah fuckin' right oh yeah
Young Money we are sick as Gonorrhea like nausea heart burn
Indigestion upset stomach and diarrhea get some Pepto Bismol ho!

CreepersWiener wrote:

Funkyterrance wrote:I was in a thrift store today and I saw a "vintage" political button thing for sale in there that said "Don't but non(some acronym) grapes!". I'm guessing it was some kind of hippie movement/protest as the lettering looked 60s-70's but does anyone know what the hell it was referring to? I should just buy the stupid thing and wear it everyday until some old hippie sees it and has a flashback or something. When he/she comes out of it I can ask him/her what the f*** it's referring to.

Not a clue what the heck it is. Can you post any pics? When I tried to make a search for it, all I got was a Lil' Wayne rap song!

And I don't wanna talk about it
Gangsta shit right in front you nigga walk around it
Nigga let me do me
They know I kick it like Jet Li Bruce Lee
And I've done what they can't do me
I'll put my gun up to your Aunt Suzie
And blow out a dubie paint her ruby I am a looney you niggas puny
I puke on the beat I juke and never fumble
Man I spit that dope like I swallowed a bundle
Gotta spit that dope up cause the old heads said if you don't it'll bust
I heard if I sell it hard it'll rush but if them people come if its soft it'll flush
Certainly don't get in the caught in the blind and keep yo curtain straight
No I don't drink wine but I smoke purple grapes sometimes see purple stars
I ain't talking about purple bapes
I gets paid early cause I be workin' late
Too many painful memories shit hurt to say
Crack flow no bake just stir and shake
Shootin' when we pull up like Urkel waste
Sip syrup got me movin' at a turtle pace
But quick draw pop out like a turtle face
Paid in full you can't murk the ace
I kill your beat and beat the murder case
That's right I'mma kill this shit and
If the glove don't fit I'mma need a catcher's mitt
Cause I'm high like a pitch yeah I'm high
Like a pitch like Mariah and shit
I guess I'm higher than a bitch
Keep it dirty like I'm lyin' in a ditch
Like Eli I'm from New Orleans I'm a Giant in this bitch
Move the G and add an S and put the I before the N and put
The A in front of that and that's what I am to the end
That's a Saint mothafucka simplify it for them
Where your funeral comes with a second line at the end yeah
But you won't be second linin' with them cause
You be in the hearse that's behind all of them yeah
I see your homies dressed in black like they finna
Ride but that fashion statement is tellin' a lie
I'm pelican fly Mac 11 inside my bullets come with
Wings and your cerebellum can fly yeah fuckin' right oh yeah
Young Money we are sick as Gonorrhea like nausea heart burn
Indigestion upset stomach and diarrhea get some Pepto Bismol ho!

PS:

Funkyterrance wrote:

CreepersWiener wrote:

Funkyterrance wrote:I was in a thrift store today and I saw a "vintage" political button thing for sale in there that said "Don't but non(some acronym) grapes!". I'm guessing it was some kind of hippie movement/protest as the lettering looked 60s-70's but does anyone know what the hell it was referring to? I should just buy the stupid thing and wear it everyday until some old hippie sees it and has a flashback or something. When he/she comes out of it I can ask him/her what the f*** it's referring to.

Not a clue what the heck it is. Can you post any pics? When I tried to make a search for it, all I got was a Lil' Wayne rap song!

And I don't wanna talk about it
Gangsta shit right in front you nigga walk around it
Nigga let me do me
They know I kick it like Jet Li Bruce Lee
And I've done what they can't do me
I'll put my gun up to your Aunt Suzie
And blow out a dubie paint her ruby I am a looney you niggas puny
I puke on the beat I juke and never fumble
Man I spit that dope like I swallowed a bundle
Gotta spit that dope up cause the old heads said if you don't it'll bust
I heard if I sell it hard it'll rush but if them people come if its soft it'll flush
Certainly don't get in the caught in the blind and keep yo curtain straight
No I don't drink wine but I smoke purple grapes sometimes see purple stars
I ain't talking about purple bapes
I gets paid early cause I be workin' late
Too many painful memories shit hurt to say
Crack flow no bake just stir and shake
Shootin' when we pull up like Urkel waste
Sip syrup got me movin' at a turtle pace
But quick draw pop out like a turtle face
Paid in full you can't murk the ace
I kill your beat and beat the murder case
That's right I'mma kill this shit and
If the glove don't fit I'mma need a catcher's mitt
Cause I'm high like a pitch yeah I'm high
Like a pitch like Mariah and shit
I guess I'm higher than a bitch
Keep it dirty like I'm lyin' in a ditch
Like Eli I'm from New Orleans I'm a Giant in this bitch
Move the G and add an S and put the I before the N and put
The A in front of that and that's what I am to the end
That's a Saint mothafucka simplify it for them
Where your funeral comes with a second line at the end yeah
But you won't be second linin' with them cause
You be in the hearse that's behind all of them yeah
I see your homies dressed in black like they finna
Ride but that fashion statement is tellin' a lie
I'm pelican fly Mac 11 inside my bullets come with
Wings and your cerebellum can fly yeah fuckin' right oh yeah
Young Money we are sick as Gonorrhea like nausea heart burn
Indigestion upset stomach and diarrhea get some Pepto Bismol ho!

PS:

The lyrics don't ring any bells but I can't say for certain. I'm just going to have to buy the damn thing. Maybe I'll pick up that little wayne song while I'm at it, very catchy lyrics. What album is it from?

jonesthecurl wrote:I heard it through the rapevine.

jonesthecurl wrote:Because of course the title of the thread is not a play on words at all.

jonesthecurl wrote:However, it depends who's going to do the spanking.

Funkyterrance wrote:

jonesthecurl wrote:I heard it through the rapevine.

Now I can't help but notice the pattern of jonesy turning creeper's threads into full out pun-fests. He's not too old for a good spanking.