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History lesson

PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 9:12 am
by Gweeedo
Have a history teacher explain this----- if they can.

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.

Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.

Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost their children while living in the White House.

Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head.

Now it gets really weird.

Lincoln 's secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln.

Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.

Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.

John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.

Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are composed of fifteen letters.

Now hang on to your seat.

Lincoln was shot at the theatre named 'Ford.' Kennedy was shot in a car called ' Lincoln' made by 'Ford.'

Lincoln was shot in a theatre and his assassin ran and hid in a warehouse.
Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and his assassin ran and hid in a theatre.

Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.

And here's the kicker...

A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland
A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe

Re: History lesson

PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 9:18 am
by Jmac1026
This was dumb years ago when I first saw it on Facebook. Now it seems perfectly reasonable though. Clearly it's a sign of the end times.

Re: History lesson

PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 9:19 am
by AndyDufresne
Agreed, clearly a sign the end is nigh.


--Andy

Re: History lesson

PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 9:53 am
by muy_thaiguy
Meh. Known about that since junior high.

Re: History lesson

PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 10:50 am
by Dukasaur
Have a real history lesson:
http://www.snopes.com/history/american/lincoln-kennedy.asp

Some highlights:
Both were assassinated by Southerners.
A dubious use of the term "Southerner." John Wilkes Booth was undeniably a Southern sympathizer, but he was born in Maryland, which (along with Delaware) was the northernmost of the border slave states and remained part of the Union throughout the Civil War. Additionally, Booth spent a good deal of his life in the North and "thought of himself as a Northerner who understood the South."

Oswald was nominally a Southerner by virtue of his having been born in New Orleans; he spent his youth being shuttled between Lousiana, Texas, and New York before finally joining the Marines. But Oswald's "Southerness" is of no real import, because, unlike Booth, Oswald was not motivated by a regional affiliation.


Lincoln's secretary, Kennedy, warned him not to go to Ford's Theatre.
Kennedy's secretary, Lincoln, warned him not to go to Dallas.
This is one of those coincidences that isn't a coincidence at all; it's simply wrong. John Kennedy did have a secretary named Evelyn Lincoln (who may or may not have warned him about going to Dallas), but one searches in vain to find a Lincoln secretary named Kennedy. (Lincoln's White House secretaries were John G. Nicolay and John Hay.)


John Wilkes Booth was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald was born in 1939.
Another coincidence that is no coincidence because it's plain wrong: Booth was born in 1838, not 1839.


Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.
Another superficial similarity with much more significant underlying differences, and a potentially dubious use of the word "assassinated."

After Booth shot Lincoln, he fled the scene and eventually (with co-conspirator, David Herold) crossed the Potomac from Maryland into Virginia, eluding capture for a total of eleven days before federal troops finally discovered him to be hiding on a farm belonging to Richard Garrett and surrounded the barn in which he and Herold were sleeping. The two men were ordered to surrender: Herold complied, but when Booth failed to drop his weapon and come out, the barn was set ablaze. A trooper named Boston Corbett, who was watching Booth through a gap in the barn's siding, shot the assassin. Whether Corbett can be said to have "assassinated" Booth is problematic — the deeply religious Corbett sometimes claimed that he had shot Booth because "Providence directed" him to do it or because he "did not want Booth to be roasted alive," but he also testified that he shot Booth because he "saw [Booth] in the act of stooping or springing and concluded he was going to use his weapons."

Oswald left the warehouse from which he shot Kennedy and was arrested in a movie theater a little over an hour later by police officers who had no idea who he was. (Oswald was initially arrested only for the murder of Dallas police officer J.D. Tippit, whom he shot while in flight; his connection to the Kennedy assassination was not established until later.) Oswald was captured alive and remained in custody for two days before being gunned down by Jack Ruby, a private citizen.

Other differences: Booth was shot in the back in the neck and lived for another three hours; Oswald was shot in the abdomen and died within minutes of his arrival at Parkland Hospital.
A month before Lincoln was assassinated he was in Monroe, Maryland.
A month before Kennedy was assassinated he was in Marilyn Monroe.
This is a latter-day addition to the list and nothing more than a bit of salacious humor. Even as a humorous coincidence it fails the test, as Marilyn Monroe died well over a year before Kennedy's assassination.
Read more at http://www.snopes.com/history/american/ ... zv4JYwQ.99


"Don't believe everything you read" was always a good motto, but it's become almost a matter of life and death since email made moronic bullshit easy to propagate.

Re: History lesson

PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 11:54 am
by mrswdk
Don't forget the crazy amount of parallels between Hitler's Germany and Putin's Russia.