What kind of inanimate object would you most like to be?

by **saxitoxin** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 6:14 am

I've posted the most popular options in the poll, but feel free to add your own.

by **john9blue** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 8:49 am

i'd probably get lots of action if i was a sofa

by **AAFitz** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 9:22 am

The Jetta is a great car. I owned a GTI for 6 years. It was the cheapest, and best car Ive ever owned.

by **DoomYoshi** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 10:00 am

AAFitz wrote:The Jetta is a great car. I owned a GTI for 6 years. It was the cheapest, and best car Ive ever owned.

Funny that an American should say that. The European jetta has the most fuel-efficient diesel engine ever designed. However, the Germans decided it was too good for the American market. Hence, the American jetta is shit in comparison.

by **DoomYoshi** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 10:00 am

Also, why isn't Phatscotty a choice? That's what I pick.

by **AAFitz** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 10:11 am

DoomYoshi wrote:
AAFitz wrote:The Jetta is a great car. I owned a GTI for 6 years. It was the cheapest, and best car Ive ever owned.

Funny that an American should say that. The European jetta has the most fuel-efficient diesel engine ever designed. However, the Germans decided it was too good for the American market. Hence, the American jetta is shit in comparison.

Actually, its just as likely as it was illegal to own such a car here.

by **notyou2** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 10:49 am

A girl's bicycle seat.

by **Funkyterrance** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 12:50 pm

I had a hand-me-down jetta and those things really hug the road. I know what you're thinking but I am pretty confident in my masculinity so do your worst.

by **2dimes** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 1:50 pm

The chesterfield, does it belong to some lipstick lesbians?

by **notyou2** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 1:57 pm

Saxi is a transplanted East German yank. He may have to google what a chesterfield is.

by **Funkyterrance** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 3:37 pm

notyou2 wrote:Saxi is a transplanted East German American.

Fixed.
He's no Yankee if he wasn't born here or several hundred years old.

by **Army of GOD** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 3:38 pm

salad tongs

by **BigBallinStalin** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 4:08 pm

B&N card. Life may be short, but I'll be serving a noble cause.

by **betiko** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 4:11 pm

can't we pick something that uses batteries, jiggles a bit and fits in a ladie's purse?

by **Funkyterrance** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 4:40 pm

betiko wrote:can't we pick something that uses batteries, jiggles a bit and fits in a ladie's purse?

Strange choice...

by **Lootifer** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 5:28 pm

Army of GOD wrote:salad tongs

Yeh me too, longevity for the win.

by **Funkyterrance** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 6:22 pm

Lootifer wrote:
Army of GOD wrote:salad tongs

Yeh me too, longevity for the win.

I dunno, I've got a pair of wal-mart tongs whose days are definitely numbered. Brazilian softwood palm trees or whatever they make them out of just doesn't fare well against even common household Italian dressing.

by **notyou2** on Sun Jan 06, 2013 10:49 pm

AoG said he wanted to be tkr4elf's keyboard or mouse.

by **Gillipig** on Mon Jan 07, 2013 7:36 am

Norton antivirus system. I don't like viruses.

by **betiko** on Mon Jan 07, 2013 7:59 am

Funkyterrance wrote:
betiko wrote:can't we pick something that uses batteries, jiggles a bit and fits in a ladie's purse?

Strange choice...

lol! hey, aren't all other options strange as well?

by **thegreekdog** on Mon Jan 07, 2013 10:42 am

I'm choosing leather sofa, which appears to have the longest shelf life of the options above.

Also, there is a chance women could sit on my face.

by **Funkyterrance** on Mon Jan 07, 2013 1:36 pm

thegreekdog wrote:I'm choosing leather sofa, which appears to have the longest shelf life of the options above.

Also, there is a chance women could sit on my face.

Where exactly is the "face" on a leather sofa???

by **thegreekdog** on Mon Jan 07, 2013 2:36 pm

Funkyterrance wrote:
thegreekdog wrote:I'm choosing leather sofa, which appears to have the longest shelf life of the options above.

Also, there is a chance women could sit on my face.

Where exactly is the "face" on a leather sofa???

It's all the face. All of it.

by **Funkyterrance** on Mon Jan 07, 2013 3:34 pm

thegreekdog wrote:
Funkyterrance wrote:
thegreekdog wrote:I'm choosing leather sofa, which appears to have the longest shelf life of the options above.

Also, there is a chance women could sit on my face.

Where exactly is the "face" on a leather sofa???

It's all the face. All of it.

Hmm, yes I suppose at least a 50/50 chance then. However you may have to make the best of those moments...

by **thegreekdog** on Mon Jan 07, 2013 4:12 pm

Funkyterrance wrote:
thegreekdog wrote:
Funkyterrance wrote:
thegreekdog wrote:I'm choosing leather sofa, which appears to have the longest shelf life of the options above.

Also, there is a chance women could sit on my face.

Where exactly is the "face" on a leather sofa???

It's all the face. All of it.

Hmm, yes I suppose at least a 50/50 chance then. However you may have to make the best of those moments...

Fair point.