GET BRITAIN FERTILE

[saxitoxin]

A new campaign is calling for people to try to get British women pregnant.



The Scotsman is being all prudish about it.

The notion that having Garraway suddenly pop up chirping “remember to have a baby!” is going to have millions of thirty-somethings clapping their hands to their foreheads and exclaiming “I knew there was something I forgot to do!” is as offensive a concept as the notion that the dry shampoo stuff is any real substitute for actually washing your hair.

This campaign does nothing to address the issues of those women who have spent a large chunk of their 20s and 30s in a long-term relationship only to have their other half declare six years in that, actually, they don’t want children after all. It does nothing to understand the problems of the single woman who would like to have a child, but has yet to find the man she wishes to have one with.

http://www.scotsman.com/news/emma-cowin ... -1-2938660

[patches70]

It seems the British have taken the long term demographic figures to heart and don't like where it's leading to.

[Maugena]

I would.
Apparently I'm like... ehhhhh.... maybe roughly 12.5% British.
~87.5% Norwegian.
Ancestry.com revealed to my dad our heritage going all the way back to England in the 1600's or something.
The Norwegian records were kind of shitty... and in Norwegian. Not helpful. And Hendrickson, son of Hendrick. That type of shit.

Considering there isn't a guarantee that I'd have children here in the states with a woman that I love... I'd give it a shot.
For example, the current girl I'm interested in doesn't want to have children. She'd be perfectly fine with adopting and feels like it would be exactly the same as having had a child or children. I beg to differ but I can understand reasons for not having a child such as "ruining" her body.

ANYWAY...
Yeah, I'd knock up an englishwoman. Only if she's moderate (not ugly or insane).
Edit: I'd like to be able to support said woman and raise the child but I don't know if that would work out for the best... Perhaps just being there financially would work.

[saxitoxin]

I would.
Apparently I'm like... ehhhhh.... maybe roughly 12.5% British.
~87.5% Norwegian.
Ancestry.com revealed to my dad our heritage going all the way back to England in the 1600's or something.
The Norwegian records were kind of shitty... and in Norwegian. Not helpful. And Hendrickson, son of Hendrick. That type of shit.

Considering there isn't a guarantee that I'd have children here in the states with a woman that I love... I'd give it a shot.
For example, the current girl I'm interested in doesn't want to have children. She'd be perfectly fine with adopting and feels like it would be exactly the same as having had a child or children. I beg to differ but I can understand reasons for not having a child such as "ruining" her body.

ANYWAY...
Yeah, I'd knock up an englishwoman. Only if she's moderate (not ugly or insane).
Edit: I'd like to be able to support said woman and raise the child but I don't know if that would work out for the best... Perhaps just being there financially would work.

your application is approved, please queue to the right

[DoomYoshi]

UPS won't take my sperm unless it's properly packaged in a box. I am worried that a fetus can gestate in a box. Should I use an envelope or will it all soak into the fibers?

[jonesthecurl]

I'll be in the Uk this week. Anyone wanting to get knocked up can see where to find me in the "pint of beer" thread. Please get in before Dead Kennedies syndrome sets in.

[Funkyterrance]

I could donate some time and make some Funkyterrance mini-me's to run around Britain to do my bidding, why not.

[saxitoxin]

UPS won't take my sperm unless it's properly packaged in a box. I am worried that a fetus can gestate in a box. Should I use an envelope or will it all soak into the fibers?

Most major airlines allow you to transport sperm provided you store it in your testicles during transport. (RyanAir may charge extra, I'm not sure.)

[saxitoxin]

I'll be in the Uk this week. Anyone wanting to get knocked up can see where to find me in the "pint of beer" thread. Please get in before Dead Kennedies syndrome sets in.

your application is approved, please queue to the right

I could donate some time and make some Funkyterrance mini-me's to run around Britain to do my bidding, why not.

your application to father four racially mixed children is approved, please queue to the right

[AndyDufresne]

I'd like to contribute, but according to science I may be unable to:

Subject: Post Any Evidence For God Here

show

I am not sure my monkey semen can dissolve a human woman's ovum, even if we soaked it in a pool of my monkey semen.


--Andy

[Dukasaur]

I'd like to contribute, but according to science I may be unable to:

Subject: Post Any Evidence For God Here

show

I am not sure my monkey semen can dissolve a human woman's ovum, even if we soaked it in a pool of my monkey semen.


--Andy

Nonetheless, on the right website it could be a big hit!

[thegreekdog]

I will contribute with the proviso of more Greek bailouts.

[saxitoxin]

I am not sure my monkey semen can dissolve a human woman's ovum, even if we soaked it in a pool of my monkey semen.

We're not picky; application approved - queue to the right.

Nonetheless, on the right website it could be a big hit!

approved, to the right

I will contribute with the proviso of more Greek bailouts.

queue to the right

[2dimes]

No fair. I want to vote too.

[notyou2]

No need to bother.

billy07 is managing all by himself.

[/]

No!
Here in America we pay good money to have Brits spayed and neutered.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healt ... offer.html

[notyou2]

No!
Here in America we pay good money to have Brits spayed and neutered.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healt ... offer.html

Excuse me, but I think this only applies to the English, not the Brits.

[BigBallinStalin]

The notion that having Garraway suddenly pop up chirping “remember to have a baby!” is going to have millions of thirty-somethings clapping their hands to their foreheads and exclaiming “I knew there was something I forgot to do!” is as offensive a concept as the notion that the dry shampoo stuff is any real substitute for actually washing your hair.

This campaign does nothing to address the issues of those women who have spent a large chunk of their 20s and 30s in a long-term relationship only to have their other half declare six years in that, actually, they don’t want children after all. It does nothing to understand the problems of the single woman who would like to have a child, but has yet to find the man she wishes to have one with.

http://www.scotsman.com/news/emma-cowin ... -1-2938660

(1) Internets
(2) Sperm bank

Problem solved.

Next!

"Hubbie/wife didn't want kids 6 years into marriage."

It's about time someone does something to counter their own low self-esteem. If you're easy enough to get lied to for 6 years, then you've got bigger problems. Let Dr. Sax sort you out.

Problem solved.

Next!

[saxitoxin]

The notion that having Garraway suddenly pop up chirping “remember to have a baby!” is going to have millions of thirty-somethings clapping their hands to their foreheads and exclaiming “I knew there was something I forgot to do!” is as offensive a concept as the notion that the dry shampoo stuff is any real substitute for actually washing your hair.

This campaign does nothing to address the issues of those women who have spent a large chunk of their 20s and 30s in a long-term relationship only to have their other half declare six years in that, actually, they don’t want children after all. It does nothing to understand the problems of the single woman who would like to have a child, but has yet to find the man she wishes to have one with.

http://www.scotsman.com/news/emma-cowin ... -1-2938660

(2) Sperm bank

Stupid idea, BBS. You can't rely on sperm banks. What if the EU seizes the deposits? It happened in Cyprus. Then we're back to square 1, having to buy DoomYoshi and his sperm a business class ticket on British Airways.

[BigBallinStalin]

The notion that having Garraway suddenly pop up chirping “remember to have a baby!” is going to have millions of thirty-somethings clapping their hands to their foreheads and exclaiming “I knew there was something I forgot to do!” is as offensive a concept as the notion that the dry shampoo stuff is any real substitute for actually washing your hair.

This campaign does nothing to address the issues of those women who have spent a large chunk of their 20s and 30s in a long-term relationship only to have their other half declare six years in that, actually, they don’t want children after all. It does nothing to understand the problems of the single woman who would like to have a child, but has yet to find the man she wishes to have one with.

http://www.scotsman.com/news/emma-cowin ... -1-2938660

(2) Sperm bank

Stupid idea, BBS. You can't rely on sperm banks. What if they seize all the sperm and give it to the EU? It happened in Cyprus. Or something similar, anyway.

WHICH IS WHY WE HAVE THE INTERNET. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, SAXI.

[saxitoxin]

The notion that having Garraway suddenly pop up chirping “remember to have a baby!” is going to have millions of thirty-somethings clapping their hands to their foreheads and exclaiming “I knew there was something I forgot to do!” is as offensive a concept as the notion that the dry shampoo stuff is any real substitute for actually washing your hair.

This campaign does nothing to address the issues of those women who have spent a large chunk of their 20s and 30s in a long-term relationship only to have their other half declare six years in that, actually, they don’t want children after all. It does nothing to understand the problems of the single woman who would like to have a child, but has yet to find the man she wishes to have one with.

http://www.scotsman.com/news/emma-cowin ... -1-2938660

(2) Sperm bank

Stupid idea, BBS. You can't rely on sperm banks. What if they seize all the sperm and give it to the EU? It happened in Cyprus. Or something similar, anyway.

WHICH IS WHY WE HAVE THE INTERNET. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, SAXI.

OH, I GET IT. A virtual sperm thing, kind of like BitCoin. That could work for women whose vaginas are USB-3.0 port compatible, I guess.

[BigBallinStalin]

Not "I guess." Some are backwards compatible.

[Funkyterrance]

I was thinking and wouldn't "GET BRITAIN FERTILIZED" be a more fitting title?

[Maugena]

I was thinking and wouldn't "GET BRITAIN FERTILIZED" be a more fitting title?

Yep.

[nagerous]

I may have fathered a child somewhere and not been told about it